I’m working on a
charity auction for work, and everyone has been incredibly generous, which
means that not only did I make this volunteer project far larger than it was
last year, I’m also surrounded by really rare and precious items. Ironically, I just watched that episode of
Grey’s Anatomy where the guys ear gets ripped off when he was at a gaming
convention trying to get an exclusive (toy).
Normally, when I have in my possession, super rare geek stuff, it’s
pretty safe because, while I understand the rarity, I don’t actually want it in
my home. However, for the first time, I
do have something I want. The advanced,
signed copy the latest in the Mistborn series by Brandon Sanderson. If I’m really careful, do you think I could
read it and no one would notice? I can be careful. Yeah. You’re right.
I better not.
We were watching Felicity
when someone was talking about how a certain relationship - saying that even
though things were really difficult that actually must mean that it was really
worth it. As I am totally engrossed in
this introspective reflection, I hear Lucas say, “Things that were really
difficult that weren't worth it: Great Wall of China.” Fair enough.
My dad called me
last week. I don’t know if you have ever
called me, but my voicemail starts off with “I’m terribly upset that I missed
your call.” Which is a really nice thing to say. Only, for whatever reason, every time you
hear it, it sounds more sarcastic.
Whoops. Ironically, I originally
changed my message because Sean thought I was being a… oh, wait, actually, what
he called me is NOT appropriate for a lady to say. So, now I have a one time, sweet professional
message followed by a series of sarcastic messages. See, the name of my blog is appropriate. Getting back to my dad:
Message from Frita:
“Hi Tiffany. It’s your father. I’m calling you because you called us and we
love you. I trust you know our phone
number, if you don’t then you are in as bad of shape as I am.”
Then, I randomly got
a poster in the mail from Frita. In
college (I told you there has been a lot of college on the brain!) I had a
poster up in my room of the Neuschwanstein castle with a hand written note
stating “There is a fine line between DREAMS and GOALS.” I don’t even know how Frita noticed it, or
recognized that it was the same castle that I had just seen in Germany, but he
sent it to me. He’s the bestest. We played a little phone tag when I called
to thank him.
Frita: You should
consider changing your message. It’s a little demeaning, and I’m used to
teaching 8th graders.
He also told me
that, and I know this is going to be a shock, his grandsons sometimes don’t
listen to him.
Frita: Is it your
inattentiveness or is it my New York accent?
Grandson: It’s not
your accent.
Friday night I was
supposed to go to the Garage with some work people. Now, had we gone after work and had been out
until 2 am, I could totally rock that.
However, (and I honestly don’t know if this is because I’m old, or TV
has gotten better), if I need to leave my house after 10 pm to go out, I cannot
rally. I can’t. I tried too.
I even got up, showered, and then went to get dressed, and suddenly I
was in my pj’s snuggled in bed texting my apologies.
Lucas to me: You would make
a great African American preacher.
(I don’t even remember what
I said to warrant this, but I do remember thinking he was right.)
Saturday morning was
fairly routine. Luke and I went to
Barnes and Noble (where I was totally hit on by this really hot guy but I
didn’t realize I was being hit on until I left the store… if anyone was
wondering why I’m single.) After the
bookstore, we headed to the grocery store for lemonade and orange juice, and
like every weekend when we just need beverages, we left with $150 worth of
groceries. (I am totally that chick,
who, when asked if I found everything, says “Welp, we came in for lemonade, so,
I’d yes.” And then, the cashier ALWAYS
searches through our sea of purchases to double check that lemonade was
found.) The only thing new and
different about this adventure was that we actually remembered to bring our
reusable bags, so I’d like a gold star from each of you. (You can send it
digitally as to avoid equal damage to the environment that I just helped save.)
There we are,
sitting in the kitchen, eating lunch, when I get a text from my dear friend
Janette who tells me that she’s in Seattle and do I want to hang out for a
bit. Do I!?
Me: Right, I gotta
leave in ten minutes.
Lucas: WHAT!? I
can’t believe you’re doing this to me.
Me: Janette is in
town… what do you want from me?
Lucas: You’re
company!
Me: Well, you can’t
have it. (sorry.)
Janette, who bragged
two years earlier about how great of a speech writer she is, was writing a
speech for the wedding that was less than 5 hours away. As she was telling the story about how she
practically challenged her friend NOT to ask her to speech but then tried to
avoid it up until the end, finished her story by saying, “Seriously, I’m
awesome. You’re going to want me to
speak at your wedding.” To which I replied, “So, you’ve learned NOTHING from
this experience.”
Janette: I hate
different views.
After my three hour
power chatting with Neville and Janette, I was off to hang out with Baby Fynn
Small (and his incredibly awesome parents too, I guess.) It was all very lovely, until after dinner
when Shane put on the new 2010 3D version of “Piranha.” We only watched 15 minutes, but these were 15
minutes I will never forget. I didn’t
want to watch, but I couldn’t NOT watch. Between the flying tatas that were
skimming the piranha filled waters, to a girl randomly being cut in half, but
before she actually splits, her bikini falls off I’m basically scarred for
life. And while this was happening,
Shane told me a real life shark spotting story—just what I needed!
Becky: I am SOOO excited! This is my first time on the B line!
Bus Driver: Dear Diary…
Sunday I spent the
day with Rach, which was epic because we haven’t done that in forever. Between brunch, gold chains, buying a
mattress, and double solitaire - it was off the hook. Aunt Pat made dinner and Uncle Ray was
telling us how the laundry machine in the little studio is one of those
machines that are supposed to wash and dry in the same machine. “But Dawne has
never been able to get it to dry. It’s
probably just a button that you have to push to get it to switch over to
drying, but Dawne hasn’t found the button yet, so clearly it doesn’t work and
we need a new one.” This is ONLY funny because it’s true. Then Lucas came back from his first studio
recording. The boys all came in with
equipment, and I heard Arda walking down the stairs saying, “My butt hurts so
much carrying this.” This puzzles you
too right?
Luke was telling us
about how the “studio” he went to (for free) was a cabin on a back road, in
which the walls were extremely thick and padded so when he walked in, he was
like, “What did Arda get us into?” He
described how scary and shady it is to have a man invite 4 teenage boys to his
cabin in the woods, but then followed the story with. “It’s okay. I’m a man. He kept the
conversation strictly to Music. It was
fine.”
After nearly 24 hours of being apart, Lucas and I were catching
up. He was explaining to Rachel about
how he has decided to “streamline the process” by strictly wearing different
colored ¾ length baseball shirts to school.
Immediately after talking about how Luke was all about streamlining, he
then proceeded to recognize the hypocrisy in making edamame on the stove top
instead of the microwave. We also talked
about the parachute/MC Hammer pants that Arda wants to make and wear. This led to a conversation about it’s time
that we started having 90’s parties with big jeans, half shirts, overalls with
one size unclipped, and sunflower shirts. (There is a reason I’m telling you
all of this.) After making the legumes,
we went upstairs to watch a movie. We
immediately agreed we needed to search the Rom Coms – and Rach laughed at
us.
Me: I told you Luke, it’s like we speak our own little language.
Lucas: More people should speak our language, it’s brilliant.
Me: I know! We should encourage people to learn our language.
Lucas: They could score points!
Me: By saying things like “Let’s watch some rom coms with fro yo up
the ying yang.”
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